Go Go Speed racer!

I now have a car!  Bogging myself down with literary writing styles? Hell no, I’m hitting the open roads!  To really sum it up, I now have a sweet new ride.  Technically its not actually all that new… as it has more than a fair share of battle damage… but sweet?  Sure, I’ll give it that. :)

Now there are few things I’d say I am addicted to (drugs, cats, soda, woman), or at least there’s a few things I’d LIKE to say I’m addicted to (soda)...  Cars are one of them.  Now don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t really consider myself a grease monkey, as I still can’t figure out what the hell an “eight cylinder engine” is supposed to do... But what I’m really addicted to is not the car itself, but just the open road.  This feeling is easily summed up by Eve 6’s “Open Road Song.”

So, do you want to hear more?  Of course you do.

My sweet new ride is a 1995 Hyundai.  It has a rather masculine purple beaded steering wheel and… wait… its a manual.  A Clutch.  That, at least until recently, was a negative.  Gone are the days of hot swapping sodas while cruising the city.  Abandoned are my honed abilities of driving the car with my knee on I-95.  Gone is the enjoyment of flailing my arms in dance patterns during the newest Insane Clown Posse song…  Only to be replaced with giving veterans relapses as my car explodes with apocalypse like sounds after simply forgetting to pop the clutch before hitting reverse.  Out comes the sweat beads that decorate my forehead as I stop and go on hills that make Duluth’s hills look like Iowa.  An in comes the terrifying concept of switching to fifth gear as I’m going 80 down the freeway.  What joys a manual brings.

Well this may all sound slightly negative so far, but I can say in true honesty, I am a man now.  There is something refreshing and exhilarating about switching gears,  It is even more exciting hitting the road with all the Korean drivers!  I can now return home with at least one newly acquired skill, because we all know that me coming back with a solid knowledge of Korean was not going to happen.